4 Reasons Why Imaginary Friends Are Better Than Real Ones

Actually, there’s approximately a bajillion reasons why imaginary friends are better(yes, that’s quantifiable), but that would take too long to go through so I made a short list.

1. No matter what you do, they will still be your friends tomorrow.

Real people take offense at everything. They're moody, subject to emotions, and are just pesky. All you have to do is take a piece of their gum and, next thing you know, they're on a rampage. Geez.

Imaginary friends will love you no matter what. Even the crazy people will get some love!

Just imagine the possibilities!

2. Even if they don’t, you can just make a new one.

Humans can't create real friends yet. We can't clone ourselves, and robots are risky at best, so this is the best option. And the best thing about it: it's free.

You can do this ad nauseam. Oh, the joy!
WARNING: Doing this repeatedly will leave you with grand expectations, and you will be disappointed.

3. You can make them look like whatever you want! 

Want a sexy babe? Done. A dragon or a lesser mythical creature? Done. A video game character? Done. How about a polka-dotted, bow tie sporting, sun shade wearing, singing blob? That's possible too.

Bow ties are cool. And all of your friends can wear them!

4. If you don’t want to talk to them anymore, you can just make them disappear!

How many times have you wished you had a remote to mute annoying people, or even just to turn them off? Now you can!

(Silence)